More children

Before Renée and I were married I was asked by my father-in-law-to-be to pray and speak with God about marrying his daughter.  I had done so before and the Lord already knew what I felt.  I don’t know what my words were but I decided to open to a page in the scriptures at random.  It was Psalm 127: 3-5.

3. Lo, children are an heritage of the lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.  4. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth.  5. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed, but they shall speak with the enemies in the gate.

                God did not need to say “Yes Clay, this is the woman you should marry.”  He instead decided to counsel me about a very important purpose of marriage.  It was simple, children are a heritage and a reward and they bring you joy.  Christ is joy; He is the one who wrought the atonement, thus enabling Renée, me and our quiver of arrows to be sealed together.

                Besides hair loss, fatigue, nausea, diarrhea, and constipation one of the results of being on chemotherapy is sterilization.  I may not be sterile, I may just have a low sperm count, but ultimately this will affect our having more children.  I love Liliana and I want what is best for her, I really believe that having a sibling will be good for her.  I also believe that the family is ordained of God.  Wanting to expand my family is important to me.  Liliana brings me so much joy, and I can only imagine having more.  The idea of Liliana being friends with her little brother or sister fills me with excitement and anticipation.  I have always just expected to have a family with more than one child.  This is why Renee and I are seeing a fertility specialist today.